Compiled by London swaminathan

Date: 24 November 2015

Post No. 2358

Time uploaded in London :– 14-46

( Thanks for the Pictures  ) 

French and Swiss

“Why is it”, asked a Frenchman of a Swiss, “that you Swiss always fight for money, while we French only fight for honour?”

“I suppose,” said the Swiss, “that each fight for what they most lack.”

Xxx

German, French and the British!

A German officer, talking to a senior member of British embassy in Berlin in 1933 the made the odd remark that the British are gentlemen, but the French are not.

Asked what he meant, he explained: “One day in 1920, some of the military control commission under a French and British officer, came to the barracks of which I had charge. They said that they had reason to believe that I had a store of rifles concealed behind a brick wall, contrary to the terms of the Peace Treaty. I denied this. ‘I give you my word of honour as a German officer,’ I said, ‘that I have no rifles concealed in the barracks’.

“Well, your British officer was a gentle man. He accepted my word of honour and went away. But the French officer was not a gentleman. He would not accept my word of honour. He pulled down the brick wall. And he took away my rifles.”

Xxx

Informer

An officious informer came to tell Cardinal Richelieu of certain free expressions that some persons had used in speaking of him. “Why how now!” said the cardinal, “do you dare to come and call me all these names to my face, under the pretence of their having been said by honest gentlemen?”

Ringing his bell, he said to the page in waiting, “Kick that fellow down the stairs.”

Xxx

Room for more Hypocrites

The Bishop of Hertford was once being patronised by a great lord who talked very insolently.

“I never go to church,” boasted the lord. “Perhaps you have noticed that, Bishop?”

“Yes, I have noticed it” answered the Bishop gravely.

“Well, the reason I don’t go is that there are so many hypocrites there.

“Oh, you don’t let that keep you away”, said the Bishop smiling blandly. “There is always room for one more, you know.”

Xxx

Am  I a Brute?

Julius Streicher, Hitler’s No.1 Jew persecutor, complained recently to foreign correspondents about the way the foreign press portrays him as a depraved brute. “Of course”, he explained, “I do fight the Jews in every way I can, but in private life I am far from heartless. For example, I have two pet canaries, and whenever I am late coming home I stumble around in the dark rather than turn on the light on and wake them up.”

–From an old Encyclopaedia of Anecdotes.