‘GOD KNOWS WHERE MARK TWAIN IS’ (Post No.5557)

 

 

 

WRITTEN by London Swaminathan
swami_48@yahoo.com
Date: 18 October 2018

Time uploaded in London – 15-30

(British Summer Time)

Post No. 5557

Pictures shown here are taken from various sources including google, Wikipedia, Facebook friends and newspapers. This is a non- commercial blog.

NB:–  a few anecdotes may be repeated, because the old book lists the same anecdotes under various headings/subjects.

BIRTHS AND BIRTHDAYS   ANECDOTES


One night in New York friends of Mark Twain, remembering it was author’s birthday, decided to send him a letter of congratulation. But no one knew in what corner of the globe he happened to be, so they addressed it,
“Mark Twain, Gods knows where.”
Several weeks later they received a note from Italy which contained two words.
“He did”
Xxxx

Lincoln’s story

When Lincoln went to the Legislature in 1854 , after an absence of 12 years from the body, he got the indorsement of the Whigs and the Know nothings He rejected their support in the following manner
Who are the native Americans? Do they not wear the breech clout and carry the tomahawk? We pushed them from their homes, and turn upon others not fortunate enough to come over as early as we or our forefathers. Gentlemen, your party is wrong in principle.

Then he told this story,
I had an Irish man named Patrick cultivating my garden. One morning I went out to see how he was getting along.

“Mr Lincoln, what do yez think of these Know Nothings?
He asked
I explained what they were trying to do, and asked Pat Why he had not been born in America.
Faith,he replied, I wanted to but my mother wouldn’t let me.
Xxx

DELIVERY OF BOOKS AND BABIES
Voltaire writing to Frederic the Great,
Madame du Chatelet is not yet delivered; it gives her more trouble to produce a child than a book.
Frederic the Great replying to Voltaire,
Since Madame du Chatelet writes books, I do not think she will produce her child in a moment of distraction. Tell her to hurry, for I wish to see you.

Xxx


BABY IN SIX MONTHS!

A gentleman whose wife was delivered of a boy six months after marriage, asked a physician the reason for this.
“Make yourself easy”, said the later, “this often happens in the case of the first child, but never afterwards”.
Xxx

Adoption Anecdotes
There is the story of the Hollywood star who had a Mexican gardener. He once informed his employer that he had adopted a baby and would like to display him. He turned up forthwith with an unmistakably Jewish child.
How is it? The surprised actor asked , that you didn’t adopt a Mexican child?

Not me, Said Jose firmly, a Jewish child for me. Jewish children take care of their parents when they are old.

Xxxx SUBHAM XXX

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