I will toast in Water, not in Champagne! (Post No.7048)

Compiled by  London swaminathan


Date: 2 OCTOBER 2019

British Summer Time uploaded in London – 20 48

Post No. 7048

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Diplomats Anecdotes

According to diplomatic procedure, the representative of a foreign country, before being actually presented to the President, always exchanges with him the text of the speeches.
On one such occasion this formality never reached its ordinary climax. Instead of stiltedly repeating the already familiar words, President Roosevelt greeted the foreign diplomat with,
Now, Mr Minister, I have read your remarks and you have read mine, so suppose we dispense with the speeches and have a friendly chat.

Toast in Water

After the Russo Japanese War, Admiral Togo, commander of the victorious Japanese fleet, visited the United States and was cordially received. A state dinner was tendered him at which it fell to the lot of William Jennings Fryan, then Secretary of State to propose a toast to Togo. Bryan, a staunch prohibitionist, would not touch champagne , and it was feared that some diplomatic impasse may arise from the difficulty.

Bryan, however, rose at the proper time, picked up his glass of water and said,

Admiral Togo has won a great victory on water, therefore I will toast him in water. When Admiral Togo wins a victory on champagne, I will toast him in champagne.


When Lady Baldwin of Bewdley visited Manhattan with her husband, Stanley Baldwin, last summer, she wanted to see the General Motors Futurama at New York Worlds Fair, but did not want to stand in line. So Earl Baldwin phoned the British consulate; the consulate called the British embassy in Washington; the embassy cabled the Foreign Office in London. The foreign office appealed to ambassador Joe Kennedy . Resourceful Joe sent a cable direct to General Motors Building at the Fair. A press agent there called lady Baldwin at the Waldorf (cost 5 cents) , told her to come right out, he would see that she was well taken care of .


I will cut off heads of all Frenchmen!

Henry VIII, in a spell of temper against his rival Francis I, King of France, commissioned a clergy man named Bonner to deliver an insolent and threatening message to the French court. The clergyman realised that it would be a risky job and protested that he could never hope to get back to England alive if he dared to talk to the French king in the manner Henry wished.
Don’t worry about that, said the monarch soothingly. If the King of France puts you to death, I will cut off the heads of all Frenchmen I can get my hands on.

That may be, Your Majesty, replied Bonner, tapping his head, but of all the heads in England, there is none that fits my shoulders as well as this one does.


Did Lord send you a message?

F Douglass



Compiled  by London swaminathan

Date: 16th September 2015

Post No: 2164

Time uploaded in London :– 20-35

(Thanks  for the pictures) 


Prejudice against Race, Religion and Colour

Frederick Douglass, noted Negro author and champion of the rights of his people, was once invited to have tea with President Lincoln at the White House.

Whenever Douglass spoke of this occasion he always said, “Lincoln is the first white man I ever spent an hour with who did not remind me that I am a Negro.”


Did Lord send you a message?

Innocently unaware of the prejudices held against him, an old coloured man, staunchly religious, applied for membership in an exclusive church. The pastor attempted to put him off with all sorts of evasive remarks. The old Negro, instinctively becoming aware that he was not wanted, said finally that he would sleep on it and perhaps the Lord would tell him just what to do.

Several days later he returned.

“Well”, asked the minster, “did the Lord send you a message?”

“Yes, he did,” was the answer. “He told me it wasn’t no use. He said, I have been trying to in that same church myself for ten years and I still can’t make it.”


Jewish Ladies

A man who was talking with Sir Moses Montefiore at a reception, found the conversation so entertaining that he completely forgot the race of his companion and made some uncomplimentary remark about the Jewish features of a lady who was passing by. The mistake was no sooner made than it was perceived. The unhappy man began to apologise profusely. “I ask thousand pardons. It was so stupid of me to forget. You look angry enough to eat me. I beg you not to devour me.”

“Sir”, replied Sir Moses, “it is impossible. My religion forbids.”



In the days of the great Abolition furore, Wendell Philips was accosted on a lecture tour by a minister who hailed from the state of Kentucky, a place with very different views concerning the ideas of the Abolitionists. The clergyman, who was more militant on behalf of his prejudices than on behalf of his creed, said, “Yoy are Wendell Philips, I believe.”

“Yes, I am.”

“You want to free the niggers, don’t you?”

“Yes, I do.”

“Well, why do you preach your doctrines up North? Why don’t you try coming down to Kentucky?”

Philips began to counter question the man. “You are a preacher. Aren’t you?”

“Yes, I am, Sir”

“Are you trying to save souls from Hell?”

“Why yes, Sir. That is my business.”

“Why don’t you go there then?” suggested Mr Philips.



Theodore Roosevelt once said, “While I was a police commissioner of New York City, an anti – Semitic preacher from Berlin Rector Ahlwardt, came to New York to preach a crusade against the Jews. Many Jews were much excited and asked me prevent him from speaking and not to give him police protection.

This, I told them was impossible; and if possible would have been undesirable because it would make him a martyr. The proper thing to do was to make him ridiculous. Accordingly I sent a police under a Jewish sergeant, and Jew-baiter made his harangue under the active protection of 40 police, every one of them a Jew.”

Red Roosvelt


I am an Irishman!

He was a red faced, middle aged Irishman, who had taken just enough to make him officious. He kept a wary eye on the conductor, and a sympathetic one on the unsteady entering passenger. Opposite the Irishman sat a young man of the most pronounced Hebrew type. He watched pat with a humorous twinkle in his black eyes.

A good natured Negro got in, and took the seat next to the Irishman. Pat threw one haughty look at the black man; then, rising with great dignity, he said in terms of unutterable scorn: “a nagger!” and sat down next to the young Hebrew. Quick as a flash his new neighbour, with an exact imitation of Pat’s tone and manner, said, “an Irishman!” and too the vacant seat next to the Negro a titter went round the car, and one Irishman looked foolish.