The Art of Conversation (IN English and Tamil)- Post No.9378

WRITTEN BY S NAGARAJAN

Post No. 9378

Date uploaded in London – –  14 MARCH  2021     

Contact – swami_48@yahoo.com

Pictures are taken from various sources for spreading knowledge;

this is a non- commercial blog. Thanks for your great pictures.

tamilandvedas.com, swamiindology.blogspot.com

உதவிக் குறிப்புகள் 18 : கட்டுரை எண் 9281 வெளியான தேதி 19-2-2021 (251-270)

உதவிக் குறிப்புகள்! – 18HELPFUL HINTS – 19 (271 to 315)

ச.நாகராஜன்

நான் தொகுத்து வைத்திருக்கும் The Art of Conversation, Listening, பழகுவது எப்படி என்பது பற்றிய அறிஞர்களின் அறிவுரைகள் சில இதோ:-

The Art of Conversation – 271 to 315

குறிப்பு எண் 271 முதல் 315 முடிய!

 Questions to avoid asking in  conversation :

  1. Avoid asking tactless questions, such as, “How much did you pay for your suit?”
  2. Avoid asking embarrassing questions, such as, “why hasn’t the company given you a promotion?” or “Did you go to College?”
  3. Avoid asking questions, which may reveal another ‘person’s lack of knowledge, such as “How many books have you read this year?”
  4. Avoid asking questions, which compel a person to answer yes, such as, “Did you find the gift we sent you useful?”
  5. Avoid asking  questions that are none of your business, such as, “Do your sisters get along well  with your stepmother?”
  6.  

TEN WAYS TO LOOSE FRIENDS IN CONVERSATION!

  1. Do you freely volunteer information in conversation or speeches when you are uninformed?
  2. Do you tend to monopolize every conversation?
  3. Do you repeatedly interrupt others in the middle of their conversation?
  4. Do you find a secret satisfaction in contradicting the speaker or showing him where he is wrong?
  5. Do you ask a question and then interrupt to ask another before the first question is answered?
  6. Do you talk continually about yourself, your family, your achievements, and hour interests?
  7. Do you have a tendency to exaggearate?
  8. Do you fail to show consideration for the sincere opinions of others on contoversial matters?
  9. Do you converse at great length about details and sometimes about nothing?
  10. Do you often gossip about others?

SOME DON’TS OF CONVERSATION!

  1. Don’t get a reputation for exaggeration or overstatement.
  2. Don’t pretend you know more than you do.
  3. Don’t try to impress others with your importance.
  4. Don’t become known as a quibbler.
  5. Don’t be rude, noisy, or discourteous when others are speaking.
  6. Don’t go around looking for trouble.
  7. Don’t continue arguing after you know you are wrong.
  8. Don’t get the idea you can’t learn anything from others.
  9. Don’t waste time on endless chatter about nothing.
  10. Don’t gossip – ever!

MAGIC THREE POINT FORMULA!

  1. Find out what the other person is interested in.
  2. Try to direct his conversation with questions he will enjoy answering.
  3. THEN, LISTEN!

LISTEN

  1. Show the other person that you are sincerely interested in what he is saying; give him all the eager attention and appreciation that he craves and is so hungry for, but seldom gets.
  2. LISTEN with enthusiasm! If you would be a good conversationalist, remember: “The wit of conversation consists more finding it in others, than showing a great deal to yourself.”
  3.  

நட்புக் கொள்ள விரும்புபவர்களுக்கு செஸ்டர்ஃபீல்ட் பெருந்தகை கூறும் அறிவுரைகள்:

  1. அடிக்கடி கண்டு அளவளாவலாம்.ஆனால் ஒரே வேளையில் நெடு நேரம் பேசிக் கொண்டிருக்கக் கூடாது.
  2. எவருடன் பேசுகிறோம் என்பதைக் கவனித்து அதற்குத் தக்கவாறு பேச வேண்டும்.
  3. கதைகளை அளக்கலாகாது. ஆனால், பொருத்தமான கதைகளாக இருந்தால், வியப்பையும் நேரத்தையும் கவனித்துச் சுருக்கமாகச் சொல்ல வேண்டும்.
  4. எவரையும் இழுத்து வைத்துக் கொண்டு பேச வேண்டாம்.
  5. நண்பர்களோடு இருக்கும் போது, பேசுவதைக் குறைத்துக் கொண்டு, கேட்பதை  மிகுதியாக்க வேண்டும்.
  6. பலர் கூடி இருக்கும் போது, விவாதத்திற்குரிய பேச்சை எடுப்பது தவறு.
  7. தன்னைப் பற்றித் தற்பெருமையாகப் பேசத் துவங்க வேண்டாம்.
  8. அடக்கமும், ஆழமும் நிறைந்திருக்க வேண்டும் -இதயத்தினுள்! வெள்ளையாகப் பளிச்சென்று பேச வேண்டும், வெளிப்படையாக!
  9. பேசும் போது எவரிடம் பேசுகிறோமோ, அவரது முகத்தை உற்று நோக்கியவாறே பேச வேண்டும்.
  10. வம்பை விலைக்கு வாங்கவும் வேண்டாம்; விற்கவும் வேண்டாம்!

பழகுவது எப்படி?

பத்துப் பேர்களோடு பழகும் போது.

  1. நாம் எப்போதும் முக மலர்ச்சியோடு இருக்க வேண்டும்.
  2. நம் பேச்சுக்களில் தெளிவும் உறுதியும் இருக்க வேண்டும்.
  3. எந்தப் பொறுப்பையும் நாம் தட்டிக் கழிக்க முயலக் கூடாது.
  4. ஒருவரைப் பாராட்ட வேண்டிய இடத்தில் பாராட்டத் தவறக் கூடாது.
  5. ஒருவரைக் கண்டிக்க வேண்டியிருந்தால் கூட, அவரது உள்ளம் புண்படாத வகையில் அவரைக் கண்டிக்க வேண்டும். கண்டிப்பதைத் தனியாகவும் பாராட்டுவதை அனைவருக்கும் முன்னாலும் செய்தல் நல்லது!

***

tags- art, conversation, பழகுவது எப்படி

Conversation teaches more than Meditation (Post No. 2485)

 

netaji gandhiji

COMPILED BY LONDON SWAMINATHAN

 

Date: 13 January 2016

 

Post No. 2485

 

Time uploaded in London :– 7-19 AM

 

( Thanks for the Pictures  ) 

 

DON’T REBLOG IT AT LEAST FOR A WEEK!  DON’T USE THE PICTURES; THEY ARE COPYRIGHTED BY SOMEONE.

 

(for old articles go to tamilandvedas.com OR swamiindology.blogspot.com; contact 

 

swami_48@yahoo.com)

 

 

SPEACH PROVERBS: PART 4 (LAST PART)

swamijis

Conversation

104.Conversation makes one what he is.

105.Conversation teaches more than Meditation.

107.Education begins a gentleman, conversation completes him.

108.He that converses not, knows nothing.

109.Sweet discourse makes short days and nights.

110.Talk of the devil, and he is bound to appear (a remark made when a person mentioned in conversation unexpectedly arrives on the scene.)

 

111.Many speak much who cannot speak well.

112.He cannot speak well, that cannot hold his tongue

113.Flow of words is not always flow of wisdom.

114.Empty vessels make the most sound.

115.Great talkers fire too fast to take aim.

116.The mill that is always going grinds coarse and fine Those who talk constantly will often say what is better left unsaid).

Jawaharlal-Nehru-Mahatma-Gandhi-and-Sardar-

117.Great talkers are like leaky pitchers, everything runs out of them.

118.He must have leave to speak who cannot hold his tongue.

119.The eternal talker neither hears nor learns.

120.The tongue of idle person is never still.

 

Slander

120.A man act unrighteous and not even make mention virtue, but if he would refrain from slander behind others back it would be creditable to him – Tirukkural 181

121.Greeting a friend with false smile but speaking ill of him behind his back, is conduct more despicable than denouncing righteousness and doing evil. – Tirukkural 182

 

122.Death after a virtuous life is preferable to a life sustained by lies and slander. – Tirukkural 183

 

SPEECH IS SILVER, SILENCE IS GOLDEN

123.Silence is golden.

124.Silence is of the gods (Chinese Proverb)

125.Silence is the sweet medicine of the heart (Chinese Proverb)

126.A good bestill is worth a groat (Bestill is a command to be silent.

127.A close mouth catches no flies.

128.It is good to have a hatch before the door (Meaning: one should be able to keep silent when necessary)

129.Good that teeth guard the tongue.

130.A still tongue makes a wise head.

patel, r prasad

First Governor General Mr. C. Rajagopalachari with Dr. Rajendra Prasad (centre) and Sardar Vallabhbhai Patel (right), 1948.

131.No wisdom to silence

  1. A wise head makes a close mouth.

133.Silence never makes mistakes (Hindi Proverb).

134.If you keep your tongue prisoner, your body may go free.

135.He knows enough that knows nothing f he knows how to hold his peace.

136.Neglect will kill an injury sooner than revenge (It is more effective to remain silent than retaliate when insulted).

137.No reply is best.

138.Silence is a woman’s best garment

Quietness is a great treasure.

139.Silence catches a mouse.

140.Sorrow makes silence her best orator.

 

141.Silence means consent

142.Silence and thinking can no man offend.

143.Silence does seldom harm.

speak not

144.Speech is silver, Silence is golden.

145.Talking comes by nature, Silence by understanding.

146.Wise men silent, fools talk.

147.He that speaks sows, and he that holds his peace gathers.

148.There is a time to speak and a time to be silent.

149.More have repented speech than silence.

150.Better say nothing, than not to the purpose.

151.Speak fitly, or be silent wisely.

 

152.He that is silent, gather tones.

153.Still waters run deep.

154.Beware of a silent man and still water.

155.From a choleric man withdraw a little; from him that says nothing for ever.

156.Dumb dogs are dangerous.

(I will give Sanskrit Proverbs on Speech and Silence separately:swami_48@yaoo.com)

 

-Subham-