PROBLEMS SOLVED WITH A CATALOGUE! (Post No.5092)

Compiled by London swaminathan

 

Date: 9 JUNE 2018

 

Time uploaded in London –  14-51  (British Summer Time)

 

Post No. 5092

 

Pictures shown here are taken from various sources such as Facebook friends, Books, Google and newspapers; thanks. Pictures may be subject to copyright laws.

 

EMPLOYMENT AND WORK ANECDOTE

An enterprising American telephone engineer established somewhere in Panama a unique business, a four-leaf clover arm. The conditions were ideal and he raised fine, large clovers which he was able to market in a variety of ways for a variety of purposes, to florists, manufacturers of novelties etc.

 

At the height of his success, all of his employees, a group of Panamanian girls, confronted him with an unprecedented labour problem.  They had no objection to the wages or the hours, they seemed to have nothing to do with the money.

 

Perplexed in the extreme, their employer raked his brains until he hit upon a brilliant solution. He sent for a Sears-Roebuck catalogue and put it in the hands of the girls, explaining to them how they could come into possession of those fabulous articles pictured therein. His problem was solved.

 

xxx

 

Poverty Anecdote

C R W Nevinson tells this story:

“One day he (Henry Matisse) wanted to do a lithograph. I offered him all my chalk and stones, but he would have none of them. He got some lithographic paper, broke one of my lithographic chalks in half, and left himself with only about an inch and a quarter of grease to draw with. When I protested, and pressed him to take a box, he assured me it was unnecessary and much too expensive a gift, a comment on the wonderful French economy and the appalling poverty he must have suffered in his early days”.

 

xxx

 

Working Conditions anecdote

A well-meaning employer desired to introduce a new spirit into his plant. He called his employees together, and said, “Whenever I come into the shop, I want to see every man cheerfully at work. I am placing a box here and I should like anyone who has any suggestions as to how this may be brought about more efficiently to just put it in here.”

 

The next day he saw a slip of paper in the box and looked at it. It said, “Take the rubber heels off your shoes”.

 

xxx

King and Emperors Anecdotes

The late King George the Fifth, in his domestic setting, was quite an average husband and family head. When, on social occasions, he would talk too long to someone or express himself too rashly, Queen Mary would prod him gently with her umbrella and murmur ‘Now George’. Also when palace guests would admire the Cloisonné, the Wedgewood, the Chippendales etc., the King would always refer to his wife, saying, ‘Now, Mary, you know about this’.

 

xxx

King of Italy!

It is reported that King Victor Emmanuel, when asked what he thought of the African campaign, replied very unenthusiastically, “If Italy wins, I shall be King of Ethiopia; if the Ethiopians win, why then I shall be King of Italy again.”

–Subham–

 

 

Kings, Fools and Scoundrels!(Post No. 2574)

Scan_India120

Compiled  by London swaminathan

 

Date: 25 February 2016

 

Post No. 2574

 

Time uploaded in London :– 14-50

 

( Thanks for the Pictures  ) 

 

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victoria

Hello! you old fool!

 

Late King George the Fifth and the Princess Victoria, his sister, were accustomed to have a brief chat on the telephone at the same hour every morning. Their conversations were of a personal, highly informal, and often joking sort. One morning when her phone rang at the accustomed time, the Princess picked up the instrument and said, Hello, you old fool.

 

The voice of the operator broke in saying,

I beg your pardon, Your Royal Highness, His Majesty is not yet on the line.

 

Xxxx

peter

 Peter the Great 

 

Peter the Great was so much affected by the death of Peter, his son by Catherine I, that he shut himself at Peterhof, intending to starve himself to death, and forbade every person, of whatever description under pain of death, to disturb his retirement.

 

The senate assembled on this desperate resolution of the prince, and Dolgorouki undertook to drive him from it.  He went and knocked at the door of the room where Peter was shut up.

Whoever you be, cried the Czar with a terrible voice,

Fly off, I will open the door and knock out your brains

 

Open, I say, replied, Dolgorouki in a firm tone, it is a deputy from the senate come to ask you whom you wish to have named as emperor in your room , since you have resigned.

 

Peter, struck with the courageous zeal of Dolgorouki, opened, embraced his faithful courtier, yielded to his councils, and resumed the reins of government.

 

Xxx

 

 Infernal Scoundrel 

 

At a dinner during the First Word War the German Kaiser was being discussed. Opinions differed about him. Some of the diners attacked him savagely. Others insisted he was a fine man despite his shortcomings. J M Barrie, the playwright, listened in silence, then without looking up from his plate, remarked dryly,

He is an infernal scoundrel but that is his only fault.

 

Xxx

tennis

War and Tennis

 

Nicholas II at the moment was playing tennis at Peterhof. When the Emperor was handed a telegram he had two tennis balls in his left hand, the racket raised , ready to  serve, in his right. He took the telegram with the right hand raising racket and telegram to his eyes, reading

Russian fleet annihilated at Shushima. Nearly all our ships sunk.

 

The Czar shoved the telegram into his trouser pocket.

Thirty-fifteen, he said and served.

 

–Subham–