More Rudeness Anecdotes (Post No.3773)

Compiled by London swaminathan


Date: 30 March 2017


Time uploaded in London:- 19-57


Post No. 3773


Pictures are taken from various sources; thanks.





One Wrong action!

When a diplomat remarked that he could not understand why he was called ill natured, for in all his life he had never done but one ill -natured action, Talleyrand asked, “And when will it end?”



Oscar Wilde’s Wit

Oscar Wilde indulged his penchant for baiting Yankees when he met Richard Harding Davis.

“So you are from Philadelphia where Washington is buried?”

“Nonsense. He is buried in Mount Vernon”, Davis answered abruptly.

Wilde, miffed, switched the talk to a new French painter,

“Do let’s hear what Davis thinks of him”, he purred.

Americans always talk so amusingly of art .

Davis answered, “I never talk about things when I don’t know the facts”

Wilde rapier wit flashed back, “That must limit your conversation frightfully.”


Samuel Johnson annoyed

Samuel Johnson was once vexed by the presence of a man at a small dinner party who laughed inordinately and with a great and ostentatious show of appreciation at everything the good Doctor said.

Finally, irritated in the extreme, Johnson turned upon the fellow and said,

“Pray, sir, what is the matter? I hope I have not said anything that you can comprehend.”



Action is familiar!

Oliver Hereford was having lunch at his club one day, when a man whom he particularly disliked came up to him. Hereford attempted to disregard him but the man, smiling broadly, slapped him on the back and said jovially,

“Hello, Ollie, old boy, how are you?”

Hereford looked at the man coldly and answered,

“I don’t know your name and I don’t know your face, but your manners are very familiar”.


Xxxxx Subham  xxxx


Rudeness Anecdotes (Post No.3469)

Compiled by London swaminathan


Date: 21 December 2016


Time uploaded in London:- 18-14


Post No.3469



Pictures are taken from different sources; thanks.




The would -be wit found himself quietly put down several pegs when, at the dinner table, he held up his fork with a piece of meat upon it and asked his hostess,
“Is this pig?”
“To which end of the fork do you refer ?”, asked one of his fellow guests.

I can’t remember your name
At a recent gathering of Hamilton college alumni, Alexander Woollcott was interrupted in the telling of a story by a former classmate, who said, “Hello Alex! You remember me, don’t you?”

Mr Woollcott shook his head,
“I can’t remember your name, but don’t tell me……” He then went on with his story.


Real Pearls and False Teeth!

At a stuffy English garden party, Beatrice Lilly, Lady Peel, wearing the Peel pearls, was approached by a lady of lineage who said maliciously,
“What lovely pearls, Beatrice, are they genuine?”
Miss Lillie nodded,
“Of course you can always tell by biting them” , she said.
“Here, let me see.”
“Gladly, said Lady Peel, preferring her jewels, but remember Duchess, you can’t tell real pearls with false teeth”.


“I simply can’t bear fools”.

One of Dorothy Parker’s more telling retorts was in answer to the snobbish young man who had been discoursing at some length at a party and had finally observed,
“I simply can’t bear fools”.
“How odd, was Miss Parker’s reply.
“Apparently your mother could”.


For deadly comments on deadly occasions Beatrice Lillie deserves some accolade.
“Don’t think it has been charming”, she said to her hostess when leaving a party, “because it has not” .


Polished Brass!
Robert Hall being unsuccessful in securing the hand of a Miss Steel, while smarting under his disappointment, took tea with a company of ladies, one of whom, the lady of the house, said, in bad taste ,
“You are dull, Mr Hall, and we have no polished steel to brighten you”.
“O, madam, replied Hall, that is of no consequence; you have plenty of polished brass”.


I never forget a Face, but……
A celebrity hound approached Groucho Marx at a party.
“You remember me, Mr Marx. We met at the Glynthwaites some months ago”.
“I never forget a face”, Groucho replied, “but I will make an exception in your case”.

Against the charge of malice, Samuel Rogers defended himself thus:
“They tell me I say ill- natured things. I have a very weak voice; if I didn’t say ill- natured things no would hear what I said”.

When one of the town’s most important movie producers had his secretary call the late john Barrymore to invite him to a party, Barrymore politely murmured  into the telephone,
“I have a previous engagement which I shall make as soon as possible”.



I am Herman Goering!

Herman Goering accompanied the Fuehrer on one of his visits to Rome. On the crowded railway platform filled with dignitaries and troops, the massive Marshal roughly jostled past an Italian gentleman of aristocratic bearing, who turned and haughtily demanded an apology. Fiercely the Marshal turned upon him and snapped,
“I am Herman Goering”. The Italian bowed and replied,
“As an excuse that is not enough, but as an explanation it is ample”.